After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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