Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
where are you?
Hypothermia
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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