I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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