This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize