somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize