dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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