I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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