i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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