I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize