they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
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if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
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Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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