Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
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I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
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