Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
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