I bet he comes in French.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
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Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
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Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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