its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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