I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I believe in your delicious
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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