It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize