I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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