if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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