HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm sobbing to NWA
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize