he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
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I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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