1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize