he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize