our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize