Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize