just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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