Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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