I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
do nipples grow back?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize