thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
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The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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