There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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