I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
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He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
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I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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