i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize