I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize