is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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