remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
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we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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