Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize