I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Can Purell be used as lube?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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