ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize