it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
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I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
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They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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