Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize