i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
my shit smells like andre
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
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