this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize