Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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