Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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