Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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