go do what you do best...puke behind churches
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
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she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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