I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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