hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
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He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
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I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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