I just gift wrapped bread.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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