16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
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Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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