Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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